Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Why Me?

Recently, I was reminded of a childhood friend from all the way back in a Korean elementary school, by meeting a person with the same name. She wasn't really a close friend to be remembered. But I remember her existence anyways and will probably never forget.

It's not that she was gorgeous in any ways; she wasn't. She may have been prettier than the norm, but at my age, I was more interested in horsing around and creating trouble than in girls.

Instead, I remember her for what she did; she nominated me for that year's classroom president. (This is not the regular class president that you may think of. In Korean school structure, each grade is divided into several "rooms", where each room acts as a tight organization. They study in same classroom for the most of the time, share same assigned teacher, and, of course, elect a president and officers of that room to take care of itself.)

It was totally out of the blue. I was, and still am, very uninterested when it comes to taking up responsibility of a social organization and the power that comes from taking a position such as a president. I was never interested in any school-related issues, nor of us students. Heck, I never even cared for a good grade. As long as I had some friends to wreck havoc with, I was golden. Even at the moment she nominated me, I was buy chit-chatting with a nearby friend and not paying attention. On top of that, she wasn't even one of my close friend as I've mentioned before. The only thing I remember her is studying piano under the same teacher.

After all these years, I am still curious the reason behind her decision to nominate me. Why? What was she thinking? And what did she see in me (if she did at all)?

PS. The election result? Do I even need to tell you? I never held such position until I was forced to take such position in college. Let's leave it at that.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

어익후



누구는 억울하게 홀로 생사를 오가는 외롭고 고된 나날을 보내는데
나는 풍족한 이곳에서 모든것이 다 있는 이 자리에서
사랑타령이나 하고 불만불평이나 늘어놓고 있고나.

아이고 내 어리석은 자신아.
언제서야 제대로 된 사람이 될꺼냐...



Monday, March 17, 2008

Thank You


I thought I was fine, that I could live happily here, alone, away from my family and my dear friends... and last weekend changed everything.

I'm not fine. I'm not as happy as I'd like to think. I'm not as independant as I think I am.

...and I certainly wasn't looking for just anybody...

The way I was thinking.. I couldn't be more wrong. I thank God for the weekend. For the friends. For the purest of all...

...Think I'll have confession this weekend.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Because We Can Hope

Not too long ago, I found out that one of my dearest friend is suffering leukemia. From his journal, it seemed as if he was hanging in there pretty well at first. But... it seems like his good health (mental health, I mean) is deteriorating as brutal treatment continues. Although not unexpected, it still makes me worried and, to be honest, shaken.

I guess as I grew up, I have been shielded from all the bad things that happens in this grim world--I have never attended a funeral, experienced dealth of someone I hold dear, or as with this case, see someone suffer greatly--that when something dire comes along, I don't know what to do. I heart starts running fast, hands sweating, muscle tense... and my mind is filled with fear, fear of losing something dear. My friend, in this case.

Maybe this (hopefully) shows that I am a caring person, not a cold machine that I thought would be great to be. (Immune to human fallacy, every little detail perfect... it seemed worth trading off human feeling at some point.) But when I can't think of anything to say, gestures to show, or anything to cheer him up, it hurts. It hurts so much that I really hate myself for being such a weak, tiny person, incapable of any good.

Hang in there, my friend. The worst symptom of all time is to lose hope. Don't leave it somewhere. It will bring you out of there. And I will see you on next Christmas season. :)

Friday, November 9, 2007

희망..

오랫만에 추억깊히 담아둔 한국에 있는
친구의 소식을 접하게 되었다.

하고싶은건 많은데 못하는 친구.
할수있는건 많은데 안하는 나.

나의 어리석음을 깨닫게 한다.

친구야..
다음에 한국에 들어가게 되면 그때 꼭 보자.

그때까지 힘내. 꼭.